Friday List!

Sarah's List:

Simplified Public Figures. No faces necessary.

Image by Ali Alsumayin

A few days ago, this started circulating, and it's been called one of the best restaurant reviews in modern times. Or the "review heard round the world." You have to feel a little bad for the guy. Or not. He is a little ridiculous.

Photograph: Food Network

This just goes to show that you can't send me an interesting article without it showing up on Mama Congo. (Thanks Josh.) So is it possible to learn Lingala in 22 hours? Possibly. Especially if you mix in a bunch of French words to compensate. Or vice versa. Which is how most people speak in Kin.

Photograph: Christopher Lane for the Guardian

Did you see this? Venice under water?

Olivier Morin/AFP/Getty Images

Yep, here's what happens when you try to be too cool. A man follows all the New York Times trend stories and just ends up kind of weird.  Man buns? Really, is this what's happening these days?

Mark Veltman for The New York Times

Woke up to this crawling out of our drain yesterday morning. These are by far my least favorite Congo creatures. I have no idea what it is. Mamicho says they're poisonous, but she also thinks birds are poisonous. Adam says he would rather have one of these in the bathtub any day over a snake. I say no way. These things are like snakes and spiders combined into one awful creature. While we were busy debating snakes vs. spider-snakes, it almost escaped. Last time I found one, our gardener chopped it in half and then we just had two spider-snakes crawling around. Can anyone identify it?

This one was nearly twice the length of my hand. But I was unwilling to put my hand any where near it for perspective.

Jill's List:

$2 Million = cost to raise 1 child?  So says Nadia Taha from the New York Times.  She's considering no children as a way to preserve her bottom line.  Okay - I get her point, but she also adds this assumption into the equation, making me think she's a little crazy:

And since we would probably not cut off our child financially once he or she reached the age of majority, I added the cost of the basics (housing, clothing, food, transportation and health care) between age 18 and 25. 

Also - this is quite different than the $300,000 the Wall Street Journal estimates - but they don't include college and assume that after 18, most kids won't be total freeloaders.

Thinking about Thanksgiving recipes.  (Yes, we do it up right here in Kinshasa.) These crazy hipsters make me want to blast the A.C., put on holiday music, and mull some wine.  Despite the fact that I just got home from a pool party...

From kinfolkmag.com

Really want to shop here.

From stephmodo.com

Just war?  Our familes are full of pacifist-leaning theologians and philosophers, so this is a particularly interesting mainstream read...especially this week as we watch the escalating events in the Middle East.  Is there such a thing as moral violence?  

Image from here.

Thinking about a friend of Mama Congo who had her stomach removed this week.  Say what?!  Really.  And her mother, brother, and sister are all stomach-less now as well.  They say that stomachs are overrated anyway.  Read more about the hereditary cancer that has impacted this amazing family here.

My beloved Canon 50mm 1:8 lens BROKE.  I am quite disturbed.  Now, the debate: to replace it with the same or upgrade to the 1:4...

Sweet soap.

Thanks to bleubirdvintage for the beautiful photo.

And.  I'll share another Kinshasa bug photo.  One of my favorites.  At night, the sky sometimes is full of these...until the chauve-souris come out and eat them all up.

While my Canon is out of commission, the iPhone is not to shabby a fill-in..

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All I Want Is A Pair of Nude Pumps.

Warning.  Do not Google "nude pumps."  I did, and even our school iBoss protection system couldn't filter out what I found.

Why was I Googling such smut?

Because I am at that point in my Kinshasa tenure where I inappropriately want a pair of nude heels. 

Looking outside today, it is a day full of Congo muck.  Meaning, if I did somehow get nude-colored shoes, they would quickly succumb to a muddy suck puddle.  Sidewalks are unreliable.  Mud is perfectly prompt.

The view from my office window...

Maybe these "flocked rain wedges" by my favorite plastic shoe company are the solution?

Photo from Anthropologie.

This weather description makes my shoe obsession all the more obscene.

Then, there is the fact that I have been a failure at heels.  This is something that I really should put on a "To-Do" list.  I don't want to be that girl who says, "Oh, there's no way I can wear heels!"  I want to be so good at wearing heels that I can wear nude ones and walk successfully through the mud of rainy season Kinshasa.  I think that would be a good addition to my life's accomplishments.

#2, 4, &7 can be found Nordstrom.  & #1, 3, 5, & 6 at J. Crew.

Therefore, I am collecting candidates (see above).  Do I order online and force my loved ones to use precious baggage allowance to carry my shoes to me from afar?  Or, do I wait and spend time wandering the shiny extremes of V & A Waterfront in Cape Town? 

A little fake-shopping is in order, I think.  Which, makes me wonder if I will ever buy nude pumps in real life.

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Do No Harm

As promised, here is a follow-up to my post about orphanages, aid, donations, expats, and Africa.

After writing down my scattered thoughts on this complicated subject, I went looking for people who have spent years considering how best to help vulnerable children in developing nations.  Lucky for Mama Congo, we have friends who have friends who know folks who have considerable knowledge, experience, and ideas on the topic.

The first person we talked to (in what will be a little "Mama Congo Chats" series) was Everett Ressler.

Multiple felines or a set of informal conversations?

Everett is someone I've know for a long while as mainly a tireless handyman, teller of magical stories, and father of two of my best friends.  He is also, however, an international researcher working on humanitarian issues, including such topics as the care and protection of children in situations of war, and the care and protection of unaccompanied children in war, refugee and natural disasters.

I asked him the three questions I posed in my last post:

1.) Why not orphanages?  They LOVE it when I visit!  The kids hug me and hold my hand and don't want me to leave.  The people running the orphanage thank me every time I bring toys and clothes for the kids.  How can this possibly be bad?

 2.) Isn't doing something better than doing nothing?  Even if I just make one day brighter for one child, isn't that making a positive difference in the life of an orphan?

 3.) I'm living in this impoverished country and I can't just sit back in comfort and do nothing.  What CAN I do to help?

And this is what he had to say:

First, anyone who has the sensibilities or humanity to see and feel for children in difficulties circumstances, and is willing to do something, is a "god-send" for most of us walk by, or close the windows to such them out.  That compassion should be encouraged, for in all the world, children without the protection of a family are the most vulnerable to every type of deprivation and abuse - everywhere.

Secondly, it is important to understand why institutions/orphanages are NOT in the best interests of children.  What we know is that there are THREE most fundamental elements for children to have a fighting chance in life:

1.  Continuous care by care givers - children who have no continuous care giver or are passed from one care giver to another as occurs in orphanages have extraordinary difficulties to overcome

2.   Age appropriate care (babies need to be cared for like babies in family - held, talked to, touched, etc; at each age, children and adolescents need the kind of care appropriate to that age

3.  Being cared for/loved uniquely as no other. 

By the very nature of orphanages, they fail consistently on all three counts.  Commonly the hidden culture and life experience within the orphanage is one in which children are not only deprived what children need for healthy development, but live in a very abusive environment from other older or stronger children and much more often than assumed by the adults themselves.

There is no question but that there are many children in need of basic services and support, who live on the street or in other horrific conditions.  The question is what to do.  There are no easy solutions.  In the many ways people around the world are grappling with failed families, leaving children on their own, but one may think of several categories of activities:

1.  Prevention - the best interventions are those that work to protect children from falling out of families

2.  Mitigation - those measures that attempt to get children back into their families, including support to families and children if essential

3.  Temporary/non-institutional care - making certain some short term arrangement is available to protect and support children while some longer term solution is found.  Long term non-institutional commitment and care arrangements.

"Do no harm" should remain a principle.  Read the experience around the world about orphanages.  Encourage people to look at unintended consequences - whether the charity being offered is causing more parents to give up their children, or the orphanage to not go beyond collecting money and things.  Support preventive/family support programmes.  Encourage local community engagement/ownership.  Support programmes that try to get children back into families, and have dedicated monitoring and child protection systems.  Report and publicly make known the worst institutions where overt abuse or neglect is occurring (terrible things are to be seen).  Be careful about providing resources because it continues to encourage institution grow, which is often a money making scheme at the core, but until other alternatives are found for the children in institutions, do all possible to help find individual care arrangements - one child at a time.

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Friday List!

Sarah's List:

Couldn't raise my children without African women or coffee. Never knew they were so inextricably linked. Of course one of the best things on earth has women's hands all over it.

Karen Castillo Farfán/NPR

Dealt with these guys every time I stepped foot outside our Cairo apartment. Hamdallah for spray paint...solely for "identification purposes," of course.

Tara Todras-Whitehill for The New York Times

On that same note, a few years ago this genius project created HarassMap to plot places in the city where women had been harassed. I can't imagine there's much un-plotted territory left.

A HarassMap Google Map shows the ares with high concentrations of sexual abuse incidents. (Image from Facebook)

Tina Fey's A Mother's Prayer for Her Child. I dare you not to laugh. Or cry. An excerpt:

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, 

Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, 

For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it.

 If you want to utter a bad name in Congo, it's SNEL (Société Nationale d'Electricité). Our electric company. A bit of insight into Congo business as usual.

The real story of the most-liked photo of all time. Yikes, those arms!

Scout Tufankjian for Obama for America

And what a week it was. Thank you for making our lives a bit easier abroad. 14 Foreign Policy perspectives on Obama. And a skip straight to the African opinion. Dare I say Obama should take a few notes from George W? PEPFAR's changed a lot of lives.

Photo from ForeignPolicy.com

Jill's List:
  
Our water filter crapped out yesterday.  We have this blue plastic bucket that looks fairly ghetto, but is actually an impressive purifying machine...when the filters don't have holes.  So, I took my medicine with Perrier last night.  Tres weird.  We might switch to these nifty little, life-saving, packets while we wait for new parts.

Photo from Cincinnati.com

A little too excited about shopping here this Christmas. 

Photo from the blog Itswhatiminto

   
Really interesting photo.  The ad as art.  Who knew that I would find the idea of the Marlboro Man  in my living room attractive?

More information about this image here.

This seems like the perfect piece of typographical quote art for a Middle School classroom.  (We just celebrated the opening of the first of our campus' environmentally friendly classrooms.  I'm looking for ways to spruce up the pristine white walls...)

Buy this print here!

Joanna! (blushing ensues)

Watching these videos of folks in Washington, Maine, Maryland, and Minnesota this week at the moments they learned that the voting public supported equal marriage rights for all people made me cry in my office.  Reminder to self:  Do not watch sentimental YouTube clips during lunch break.

Photo from the West Seattle blog.

And.  I'm headed to Accra in March for a little business trip.  I've never had a business trip before.  Let alone to Ghana.  Feeling quite excited.  But not nearly as excited as Mama Vida.  She is from Ghana and is already writing down addresses of family members that I absolutely must visit...

Image from here.

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Allez Voter!

Hey - go vote, American folks!

We tried to have a patriotic photo shoot in honor of today: 

Okay, found the right flag...

Today has been spent calculating time differences in preparation for tonight's American-in-Congo strategy: stay up all night or wake up at 5am when the real election results start coming in and checking FiveThirtyEight obsessively.

My Grades 6 and 7 self-organized a vote in class today.  It was a landslide for Obama.

(Insert nail biting.)  

See you on the other side...

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Tropical Medicine

I've been thinking a lot about the Oregon Trail lately. And imagining our names popping up in pixelated tombstones. Here lies Sarah....

Make your own tombstone here.

There's something about being sick in Congo that makes you feel incredibly vulnerable. There's no good reason for this. We have a perfectly fine doctor and easy access to medication. Most of the time it's easier than going to the doctor in Virginia and using the Target pharmacy. But still every time I've been sick I'm pretty sure it's the end. Congo viruses feel stronger and more resolute to bring you to your knees. I imagine it's just what they felt on the Oregon Trail. Or at least the computer game version. 

My last battle with a Congo funk surrendered only after two types of antibiotics and several weeks of feeling sorry for myself. I finally dragged my throat to our beloved doctor who took one look and told me I had an infection of my pharynx, which I was embarrassed to add to the list of words I've learned in French before English.

Then he said the words every expat living in the tropics dreads: "You have to sleep without air-conditioning." Nooo! Are you actually trying to kill me? Just remove my throat now. It's worth it.

The next day Adam took himself to the doctor for a minor hand injury that was so silly I refused to accompany him to translate. The doctor then sent him to get an x-ray. I'm really kicking myself because it sounds like his adventure would have been great Mama Congo material.

The recommended "radiologist's" office was down a bumpy road in the middle of no where. Adam found himself in a familiar situation of explaining something in French and a gaggle of women laughing uncontrollably at his frustration. This really is the story of his life. (Why, oh why did I refuse to attend this spectacle?!)

$30 and couple of popped veins later, Adam returned to the doctor with his x-ray. He has a tiny* place on his hand that would have probably required a minor splint in the States, but in Congo he got a full-fledged, rock hard plaster cast almost to his elbow. Being the ever-supportive wife, my first response was, "Why did you let him put that on you!? How are you planning on taking care of babies now?"

"How am I supposed to take care of babies now?!"

To his credit, he has continued to wash out diapers, knead bread, swim and carry 2 babies at once. The only thing thus far he's asked to get out of is sliding down the slide into the pool with Charlotte. Okay, fine. I'll give him that.

Of course, both of our children are sick now. I knew this would happen, but I have doctor's office fatigue. So during my visit I preemptively asked how long I could wait before bringing them in. He said, "Eh, let them go for a few days with a fever, then call me." I trust him because at Charlotte's last visit she projectile vomited in his face and he didn't even flinch. That's the sign of a good doctor. Tropical medicine isn't so bad.

** After a re-reading of this post I realize I've disqualified myself from both wife-of-the-year and mother-of-the-year awards. I blame it on my throat. And self-pity.

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Friday List!

Jill's List:

I was looking for interesting ways to talk about nutrition with a sustainability angle with my middle schoolers, and stumbled upon this.  Everybody loves a little Michael Pollan and Jamie Oliver, right?

Short Films image from this site.

Confused about cloth diapers and overwhelmed by the crazy information overload online?  Check out this downright soothing tutorial using Bum Genius diapers.  Love it.

Photo from the lovely blog, Bleubird.

A gorgeously curated online shop called Clementine.  (P.S. I adore most things from here anyone-who-might-want-to-gift-me-anytime-in-the-near-future.)

Photo from Clementine's "About Us" page.

Before you roll your eyes at me for suggesting you consider making Millet Croquettes to take with you on your next airplane flight, just go and take a look at this amazing cooking blog.  Among other creations, this woman carefully prepares delicious little packets of goodness to replace the muck served on most airlines.  Swoon.

Millet croquette image from 101 Cookbooks.

Have I jumped on the hair powder bandwagon yet on this blog?  Because I have in real life.  I got a sample of this stuff and have been using it religiously to combat the Congo grease.  Design Mom posted this amazing hair photo in her recent post about the subject that has me pining for long hair again...

Image from Design Mom.

What do you think?  Is this true?  Is technology changing the way kids learn?  Is that a bad thing?

Image from the New York Times

If you didn't catch Wednesday's post-Sandy Colbert Report, you should get on it. Faux news at it's poignant best.  Example:

Colbert had only one explanation for the unexpected bromance between Obama and Christie: “Hurricanes have a well-known liberal bias.”

Colbert Report image

Oh yeah.  One more thing: VOTE.

Image by Jason Wong

Sarah's List: 

I've become really good at scanning the text in articles about Eastern Congo just enough to inform myself without reading too many details to get nightmares. I've been following this story where we almost lost a doctor who has treated over 40,000 women. Too close to tragedy in a battle of good vs. evil. 

  by  Julien Harneis 

Adam and I have finally finished a project we started this summer. No, not a respectable project like home renovation, but rather watching MasterChef Australia. (Don't click if you want to watch! The winner will be spoiled.) I'm resisting the temptation to write an entire post on my love for this show. (You're welcome.) If you're interested, each season of MasterChef Aussie totals 70 episodes at over an hour each. Yes, that's why it's considered a major undertaking. But well worth the time to see what Aussies get right in reality TV. Drama free, educational, wholesome television producing. A completely foreign concept for many of my compatriots.

All this elegance in a dish.

  by  szeke 

Straws as art, who knew?!

  by  Nina Matthews Photography 

"Your Friend, Conan" and "IN EVENT OF MOON DISASTER" and other fascinating Letters of Note: Correspondence deserving of a wider audience.

Letter image from here.

This one's been floating around all week, but in case you missed it Sorting the Real Sandy Photos From The Fakes.

And Brain Pop, an ordinarily paid subscription only website for kids, is free all week! If Sandy closed your school, they wanted to make sure kids still get their learnin' in. Thanks, Brain Pop.

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